He'll Be Faithful To Complete It

Something I have discovered through the fire and brim stone of this semester is that the study of God takes a lot of faith! You become aware of the good, the bad and the ugly and through it all you have to continue to discover who you are and why you are doing what you are doing!

A couple weeks ago I shared with my pastor, Fr. Meehan, that I was struggling with studying my faith, because when you put your faith under the microscope all its imperfections suddenly engulf you and you begin to drown in doubt. I shared that I was learning to separate my faith from my studies so that I could hold onto my spirituality in a world of academia. I thought this was the thing to do. Fr. Meehan voiced his concern with my decision and offered an alternative. He suggested that instead of separating the two, begin with a prayer that the things God intends for my spirituality through my studies will become evident. What I didn't realize until this point was that completely separating the two was like separating Siamese twins that share a heart; one will inevitably die. By connecting the two I am allowing God to work within me yet sifting though what is unhelpful to my spiritual life.

Finals week was another time of trial! For a person like me who suffers from test anxiety, taking a test that is accounting for 65% of your final grade is like facing the lions in the arena of the coliseum! As I am writing this it is obvious that I have survived, but I must emphasize that it was only barely! Last week's second reading contained the verse, "He who began a good work, will be faithful to complete it in you." This became my mantra for the week! I kept trying to remind myself that God was the one that brought me to this point in my life and God would not let me down! I don't mean to suggest that I did not have to work because God was handling it, I simple offer the opinion that if I do my part than God will sure help me through it and together I will proceed to walk the path before me!

Next semester's stress, although it should not be as encompassing as this past four months, has already begun with an emailed assignment from my professor for the first day of class: a book and reflection paper! UGH! I just keep saying, "He who began a good work, will be faithful to complete it in me!"